“Every nerve and vertebrae in my neck and spine screamed at me 24 hours out of the day every day of the week. Bayer Back and Body failed me, going to the chiropractor made it worse, and acupuncture helped, but only temporarily. I just knew this pain was going to take me OUT. I was always exhausted, irritable, and definitely not as mentally sharp as I normally would have been.

So I decided to take matters into my own hands and do a little experiment: track when the pain was the greatest throughout the day. I made note of all the activities I would participate in, how long I had been in the car at any given moment, how long I’d been sitting in the same position, what kind of chair I was sitting on, etc. It was legit.

After a few weeks, I was certain I had the answer. My mattress was indeed the culprit. After what was meant to be a period of rest and rejuvenation, I felt like I had been hit by a truck.  So I began the hunt to finding a new mattress. I looked at all the up and coming brands, brands that were backed by scientific studies, and all the other recommendations received by friends. I knew that I couldn’t just order one online without having touched it first. So I took a trip to the mattress store.

I honestly banked on spending half the day in the mattress store because I can be real indecisive. And I had to find a mattress that was going to make me a new woman, a mattress that would change my life! I was PRESSED y’all. I get in there and no other customers were in the store. I went from mattress to mattress trying to find my perfect fit. I had quickly come to the conclusion that it couldn’t be too soft and it couldn’t be too hard. It had to be something smack dab in the middle. The young lady that worked in the store asked me if she could help me. I said, “YES GIRL!” and proceeded to tell her what I was looking for. I told her my price range and she gave me this look like, “hmmmm…” with the little squinty eyes. I’m like “Baby, that’s almost a stack. I know you got SOMETHING!” We checked out the first mattress together and I was in love. AND it was in my price range. Her gut told her to double check the inventory on that particular one and OF COURSE, they were out of stock. I informed her that it was extremely important that I get this new mattress ASAP. So she walked me over to one particular mattress and gave me the rundown. It was perfect for sleepers with back issues. It was medium plush- smack dab in the middle. And it even had the cooling gels engineered into the mattress for those who overheat at night (ME). I was like “Oh yes! ISSA MATCH!”

She informed me that it was a little over my budget. I’m distraught at this point. I’m like, “God! Aye man! Can you PLEASE just  help me find something tonight! Drop a mattress from the sky, something!” The young lady said, “You know what. I’ll make you a deal. Since we didn’t have the one you wanted in stock, I will discount this one with the box spring, give you free delivery and set up, and throw in a complimentary frame. All of this for the original cost of this mattress.” (Insert Praise Break). You better believe I signed on the dotted line. Although that mattress was over the amount that I wanted to pay, I sacrificed a little bit more to get an even greater package deal than what I would have gotten with the first mattress.  (You know where I’m going with this…)

I had to keep the bed for at least 30 days and if I wasn’t satisfied, I could return it. But she insisted that I would be one happy sleeper. The first night in my bed was surreal. You know that feeling when you first get in the bed and you have to find “that spot” before you can go to sleep? Well I was trying to find “that spot” and the Holy Spirit spoke to me in that moment. He said, “Stop fighting me. And rest in me.” UM. I woke up right on up after that because I was convicted. I had to stop fighting God.

I was working so many hours between both jobs. I had all these issues and a plan for each issue. I wasn’t getting any sleep. I was emotionally, mentally, and physically drained. I worried until the cows came home. I was just a wreck because I’d been trying to do everything on my own. And whatever wasn’t done yet I was pulling my hair out trying to figure out the where, the when, and the how to getting it done. Not only those things, but I had to stop yielding to temptation. I had to stop being a carnal Christian and commit to being who God has divinely designed me to be.

The first night in my new bed I remembered a very specific scripture in the Bible. Matthew 11:28-30, “Come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn of me; for I am meek and lowly in heart: and ye shall find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.” (KJV). I had to give it all to God. I was miserable and that was a direct result of my attempts to devise plans and solutions to my problems WITHOUT first consulting Him nor including Him. God can’t get the glory out of anything He isn’t a part of. The spiritual warfare had been too real, constantly struggling between who the world wanted me to be and who God has called me to be. I was so tired and I wanted to rest. God wants me to rest in Him and with Him. Instead of climbing into the bed of lies, pain, frustration, and sin, I needed to climb into that bed of love, peace, mercy, and saving grace.

I thought about the things I would have to sacrifice to be able to pay a little extra for this new bed. At first glance, I was frustrated being faced with that. For those that know me, this sacrifice would mainly be food and eating out all the time *shrugs*… But think about this in a spiritual sense, is there something you should let go of or sacrifice in order to be in the will of God? Is there something that is hindering your walk and growth in Him? Is that thing you’re holding onto worth your soul? Hebrews 12:1-2 tell us to strip off every weight (sin) that slows us down and run with endurance the race that God has set before us. And that we can do this by keeping our eyes on Jesus Christ who looked beyond the suffering because he knew of the JOY that would come. In Him we can gain new strength, courage, wisdom, and joy. Any materialistic thing that I was holding on to He gave to me in the first place. Any thing that I was holding onto that brought pain and grief or pulled me further into sin, He can deliver me from it. I go through all these changes and just do the absolute most like I’m Wonder Woman and for what? There is no one like God. He is incomparable, irreplaceable, and unrivaled. God is MATCHLESS.

I had to get rid of the old mattress that slowed me down and didn’t allow me to rest. Just like I had to let go of the stress and worry and defiance and disobedience and submit to the will and word of God. As a result, I now understand the phrase “sweet sleep” and don’t wake up feeling like the Tin Man! But who would have known that a trip to a Mattress King would lead me to an encounter the Matchless King…”

-J. White